Vomiting pumpkins

I found these emails in my inbox and before deleting them, figured it might be good to post them here before I remove them from my personal internetz. (Source is a bunch of emails forwarded to me by people who like to forward emails. In this case, it was from my mom. She's a stitch. Obviously.)

Happy Halloween, everybody.

The bees are taking over

So my dad sends me these photos. Apparently, my mom mentioned that there seemed to be a lot of bees buzzing around in their backyard. One of their neighbors offered to look around for them to see if she could figure out what the commotion was all about ... it turns out there is this HUGE hive of honeybees in this small plastic cabinet thingy my mom uses for gardening related stuff.

Winnie the Pooh is drooling somewhere

Umm, can you grab that box of Miracle Grow for me?

Where is a bear when you need one?

I don't think my parents imagined this as part of their retirement plan.

The punchline to this story: So I look up some exterminators for my dad to call so he can get this safely removed. (My dad is *really* allergic to bee stings - to the point that if he gets stung, it's probably curtains for him.) After I give him the info, he asks me, "Will we be able to keep the food?" (He meant, "Can I keep the honey?") My answer: "Perhaps. But Lars Gustafsson would tell you to just go to the store if you want some honey."